Lions And Lambs

So yeah, the whole "March comes in like a lamb and goes out like a lion" thing isn't just talking about the weather anymore...

Alrighty then... this is going to be a little bit... infernal... so yeah... ye be warned...

The Music in Me... Or Not
Something that used to make my day a little brighter, used to be something that made getting up extra early one morning a week worth it, doesn't anymore. In fact, it sucks. And you know why? Because nobody cares anymore. There's no energy, no vitality. No heart. And it sucks. It's a waste of time right now. It's boring, it's tedious, and I hate every second of it. Maybe the music just isn't in me anymore... or maybe it's just not in anybody else.

In other news... this month's Cosmo was rather disappointing.

She's Baaaaaaack
I'm getting annoyed again. This is not a promising development. When my default mental and emotional state is best described as somewhere in between "mildly tweaked" and "somewhat dissatisfied", it can't be too long before those lovely impulses blossom into "what the hell is wrong with the universe" syndrome. Which means the boomerang has just completed its outward journey and is on its way back, to steal an image from those sensitive-tooth-toothpaste commercials. Fact is, there's nothing wrong with the universe. Aside from the obvious, I mean... hunger, war, global warming. But that's in a whole other ballpark. The problem is 100% internal. As the Reverend Larry Shannon says, "When you've been living on the fantastic level, but have got to operate on the realistic level. That's when you're spooked, that's the spook."

I can feel it. She's coming back. Like that freakin' cat in the nursery rhyme. The one that wouldn't die. I guess I'm spooked. And I have a feeling I'm gonna stay that way.

Bear
It's the second-guessing. I'm totally indecisive. Roles reversed, would I be saying the exact same thing to you? Almost definitely. Roles as they are, can I appreciate that this seems a little sketchy from the outside? Absolutely. Do I sound like I've cracked yet? Probably. Is what you're saying crazy? No, I'd probably be saying exactly the same thing.
The problem arises when I have to figure it out for myself. Am I just jumping at shadows? Is this really what's happening? And if it is... how come I can't freakin' tell? Aren't you supposed to be able to just know when things like that are happening. You're supposed to have some sort of gut-feeling, magical compass-esque thing that just lets you know.

I'm stressed. I wasn't before. So much for a good vent...
Restlessly Dreaming
Daydream Believer

Razor Wire Shrine

Good god, it's been almost a month since I wrote anything here... wow.

Alright, here goes... deep breath...


28 Hours 28 Hours 28 Hours 28 Hours
(Actually, I think it'll be closer to 32... but that's beside the point.)
3 Weeks from today! *Squeeeeeee*

Think I might be a little excited?

In any event, something I was a little concerned with is probably not going to be an issue, which takes one hell of a load off my mind. I'm looking forward to this again, which is good, because for a while I was doubting whether it was going to be worth the trouble. It will.

You spiteful prick.

Well, that's that, I guess. It's over and done with. I don't know if I'll ever get that opportunity again, which is kind of sad.

Bah... I was going to write something... but here I am sitting in front of the computer, and I'm drawing a complete blank. I hate when that happens.

Light A Match In The Wind
Quite frankly, I wish I had her composure and control... or at least the ability to fake said composure.


It's only when you overdraw your emotional bank account that you can find out how much credit you have.

Keep Dreaming
Daydream Believer