Page 11 Ingenue

So I'm NaNoing. It's harder than I thought it would be, but also easier, if that makes any sense. The words are coming, all right, but they're not the kind of words I thought they'd be. I had one character, strong, smart, savvy, with all these interesting things to do, but I could not for the life of me make her do them. I mean she did them, I just couldn't pull off a play-by-play, I had to resort to some expository bullshit after the fact. At first I thought that it was because I'd let myself get to attached to her, that there was too much me in her to let her do things I wouldn't or couldn't. Then I realized that this all comes from the write what you know thing. I've never done those things, or anything really like them. The one event I got closest to getting right on paper is the one that was closest to my own experiences. It's because she wasn't enough like me for me to get in her head on those things, because if I did, she'd act like me, and she doesn't. And then I realized that this other character I'm writing about is a lot more accessible to me. And damn it I swore I wouldn't write about my own love life. I'm not, completely at least. It's not me, and it's not him on the paper. Sure, they're people a little like us, but it's not what happened, or the way it happened. But it's close enough. Having met and spoken with a hedonistic don juan of a man, I can more easily imagine his tricks. Which is a lot like where Devin came from. Aha! An epiphany, she can't fall under his spell because she is him. He can't bewitch her because she already knows his games, and can play them against him. Maybe win. Enter the ingenue. Of course, that's why she couldn't be a sideline character. The story is really about her. Funny, isn't it? She didn't show up until page 11.

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Yorick

Should I have been upset? I did know him, or know of him, I suppose. We didn't get along. I didn't like him much. I suppose I'm not upset because I didn't plan or expect ever to see him again anyways. That sounds harsh. Its still a shame. Thank God for seat belts.


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