All things considered, this is a really bad time for my own brain to be screwing with me. I can handle my boss screwing with me, I can handle my teachers screwing with me, I can handle my friends screwing with me. I don't know if I can handle my own brain screwing with me. I'm used to being practical-joked from external sources, but I'm not so used to being practical-joked from inside my own head.
Maybe it's not a joke.
Fact is, I haven't pictured myself being that way in the future for a very long time. When I was little, sure, but lately, I've been decidedly of the mind that domesticity really isn't my bag. Except all of a sudden I changed my mind. Not a total 180... not yet at least, but a distinct change in mindset. All of a sudden, this idea I've been thinking just wasn't me feels ridiculously... right. I don't know why, and I'm not sure if this is a change for the better or not. I just don't know.
I don't know. I hate not knowing. I'm a planner, I need plans, even if they're only written in sand next to an ocean. The problem with this being that life doesn't adapt well to plans. Which is why I was planning to not need plans... if that makes sense, which it probably doesn't.
L'Ange
Good luck. Good luck. Good luck. I hope the box had good news in it. You've been so good to me, I need to believe that all that good karma will be rewarded. I think you could handle even the bad news, but I don't want you to have to. Good luck. Good luck. Good luck.
Everything's about to flip. I can't say I'm not glad... it'll take one of the loads off my mind. Just one week left.
Anyways, keep dreaming.
Daydream Believer
This is a bad time for my philosophical cornerstones to get moved around. A really bad time.
Fact is, I haven't pictured myself being that way in the future for a very long time. When I was little, sure, but lately, I've been decidedly of the mind that domesticity really isn't my bag. Except all of a sudden I changed my mind. Not a total 180... not yet at least, but a distinct change in mindset. All of a sudden, this idea I've been thinking just wasn't me feels ridiculously... right. I don't know why, and I'm not sure if this is a change for the better or not. I just don't know.
I don't know. I hate not knowing. I'm a planner, I need plans, even if they're only written in sand next to an ocean. The problem with this being that life doesn't adapt well to plans. Which is why I was planning to not need plans... if that makes sense, which it probably doesn't.
L'Ange
Good luck. Good luck. Good luck. I hope the box had good news in it. You've been so good to me, I need to believe that all that good karma will be rewarded. I think you could handle even the bad news, but I don't want you to have to. Good luck. Good luck. Good luck.
Everything's about to flip. I can't say I'm not glad... it'll take one of the loads off my mind. Just one week left.
Anyways, keep dreaming.
Daydream Believer
1 comment:
Making plans to not make plans is just a little bit ironic. I've always needed plans. I've always looked to the future. Sometimes it's good. It gives you something to aim for. There's no shame in wanting domesticity. At the same time, being "domestic" doesn't mean you have to give up everything you wanted. You can still have that life, the best of both worlds. It's doable.
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